THE GOODS: LIVE HARD, SELL HARD

Written by Hombre Divertido

In 1980 Robert Zemeckis co-wrote and directed a film starring Kurt Russell as a cheesy care salesman out to sell a bunch of cars in a short period of time to save a dealership. Used Cars was full of outrageous characters and cheap laughs that appealed to a teen audience, as is The Goods starring Jeremy Piven.

Piven plays fast-talking, gun-for-hire Don Ready, who may be one of the most enjoyable characters, albeit one–dimensional, to hit the screen since Ron Burgandy. Unfortunately, this review has already referenced a superior film on the same topic and a superior self-absorbed character, and we are not even out of the second paragraph.

Piven is surrounded by an outstanding, but completely wasted supporting cast including Ving Rhames, David Koechner, Ed Helms, Kathryn Hahn, Ken Jeong, Ron Riggle, Alan Thicke, James Brolin, and Charles Napier, just to name a few. Unfortunately this collection of outstanding comedic talent, all of whom have proven their ability to play solid characters in other endeavors, is given little to do, as writers Andy Stock and Rick Stempson provide muttled motivation and trite storytelling. Koechner is wasted as a car salesman with little to do throughout this tired 89 minutes other than to ward off the homosexual advances of dealership owner Ben Selleck (Brolin). Rhames is given even less to work with and stands around for the first 30 minutes of the movie. Napier gives the most enjoyable performance, simply because it is clear what his crusty old salesmen is about.

The story is overwritten and gets bogged down in ridiculous plot choices that make what should be a simple “good guys beat the bad guys” tale into a convoluted mess. Our talented cast is left standing around trying to sell the audience a product that just doesn’t get the mileage it should.

The Goods is not without laughs. The commercial produced to illicit sympathy and bring people to the dealership generates big laughs, as does a scene, that appears to be improvised, with Will Farrell (in an uncredited cameo) falling to his death, surrounded by sex devices.

Recommendation: This is a B-movie reminiscent of the late seventies and early eighties. There is one solid character backed by a well-intentioned performance by Piven, and some good laughs mostly based on foul language and raunchy themes. It’s fun for a while, but the script eventually falls flat, and all that talent can’t fix bad writing. Used Cars may not have the all-star cast, but it does have a far-superior plot. Wait for The Goods to hit DVD shelves and have a Saturday night double feature.

STEP BROTHERS

Written by Hombre Divertido

Perhaps Tropic Thunder will be the comedic hit of the summer; Step Brothers certainly isn’t.

Oh, Step Brothers is funny. The script is shallow, and the characters underdeveloped, but enough comedy is generated by witnessing how many different ways the talented duo of Will Farrell and John C. Riley can drop the F-bomb to warrant a viewing for those looking for comedy in what has been a bleak summer. There is enough profanity in this film to spawn a drinking game. Like a drinking game, Step Brothers will leave you wondering the next morning as to what you thought was so funny during the experience the night before, but, for whatever reason, you will laugh as the game is being played.

Written by Farrell and director Adam McKay who first paired Farrell and Riley in Talladega Nights, Step Brothers chronicles the story of two middle-aged losers who still live at home. The “boys” are brought together when the mother of Brennan (Farrell) played by the versatile Mary Steenburgen marries the father of Dale (Reilly) played by Richard Jenkins and they all move under one roof. The movie has consistent success as the two lead characters hate each other and are tormented by Derek (Adam Scott in a one-dimensional but funny performance) the successful younger brother of Brennan.

As attempts are made to progress the plot, the laughs are left behind, and more outrageous characters are introduced in attempts to salvage the final thirty minutes of this ninety-five minute outing. The two main characters eventually make a completely muddled transition to adulthood and manage to squelch the laughs with the premise of the film in one fell swoop.

McKay proves he is a far better director than writer as he manages to glean enough laughs from the profanity and physical antics worthy of The Three Stooges found in a script that is nothing more than a weak idea that might make a decent Saturday Night Live sketch.

Recommendation: The laughs here are far cheaper than the price of a movie ticket, but there are laughs to be found, and one could certainly do worse this summer. You won’t remember much of what you thought was so funny when you saw it, so enjoy what you can when you do.

BLADES OF GLORY

Written by Hombre Divertido

Though it could be called Talladega Nights on Ice, Blades of Glory will please the average Will Farrell fan.

In this outing, Farrell is Chazz Michael Michaels, the hottest thing to hit ice-skating since…well, just the hottest thing to hit ice-skating. His chief rival and polar opposite is Jimmy MacElroy played by a subdued Jon Heder of Napoleon Dynamite fame. The two tie for Gold at the American championship, a fight breaks out on the award podium, and they are both banned from the sport for life.

Jimmy becomes a skate salesman, while Chazz skates in a kiddie Ice show. Chazz’s drunken exploits on ice during the performance for the kids are some of the funniest moments in the movie. Luckily a loophole is discovered, and they can get back into professional skating if they team up as a pairs team i.e.: The Odd Couple on ice.

The situation of two men becoming a skating team while living and training together is ripe with laughter, and Blades delivers albeit at the rankest level. There are plenty of crotch shots, and Farrell strutting his stuff, and even a few well-crafted lines to keep the more creative fans happy.

If Blades lacks anything it is the ensemble cast that Farrell had around him in Anchorman. Though the performances of Heder, Craig T Nelson, Will Arnett, Amy Poehler, and Jenna Fischer are adequate, the characters are unexplored, and subsequently overshadowed by the cameos of former ice-skating greats, or the performance of Jim Lampley as the skating announcer who has one of the funniest lines in the film.

In Anchorman Farrell was surrounded by well-developed characters played by incredibly talented actors. Though the performances of his supporting casts in Talladega Nights were good, they were not up to that of Anchorman, and the downward spiral continues in Blades. Ultimately we the viewers suffer for it.

Farrell is a strong enough actor to carry the film Stranger Than Fiction, but when doing an outrageous comedy such as this, he needs more support.

Recommendation: This film definitely has its moments, but you quite possibly will leave the theater unsatisfied. Wait for the video, and make it a double feature with Anchorman to insure a night of solid laughter.